Chapter Five: Part Two

The reception was held on the hotel where Agatha celebrated her eighteenth birthday.

While waiting for the newlyweds to arrive, Leni chatted with her cousin’s childhood friends.

“Hi Leni, it’s me Teta,”

“Oh yes, the one who made those tickets to heaven. How are you?”

“Naalala mo pa pala yun.Well, I’m three months pregnant with my first child. How about you, are you still studying?”

“No, I graduated last March”

“Wow! That’s great. Dalaga ka na, we almost didn’t recognize you. By the way, your dress looks good on you. Where did you get it?”

“I bought it from Ate Agatha’s favorite boutique, but my friend actually chose it for me.”

After having a short conversation with them, Leni felt that her stilettos were killing her. Unable to withstand the pain, she excused herself and rushed to the garden.

She sat on one of the benches and removed her shoes. She let her feet rest for a while until she decided to call her ever-dependable best bud, Adam. He’s the only person that she could run to for fashion emergencies.

“Adam, I’m afraid to have blisters because the stilettos hurt. Do you know any remedy for it?”

“Uhm..A band-aid will do”

“Thanks. Honestly, I’m getting bored. Call me dramatic, but I miss you guys. Pumayat ka na ba?”

“Well, I’m getting there. Faith and I started going to the gym recently. Sana nga kasama ka eh. Wait, what’s that noise? I think I heard someone yelling. Scandalosa, tinalo pa ata yung boses ni Faith”

“Oo nga eh. Wait, I’ll check who that person is.”

Leni put down her phone, turned around and saw someone nagging Aldo. He just shook his head without saying a word. It was Carol, his girlfriend demanding him to drive her back to Manila.

When she noticed that Leni saw her, Carol gave her a condescending look and said,

“What the hell are you looking at?!”

Leni apologized and left them right away. She walked around the hotel to look for a clinic, but she wasn’t able to find one. Then, she chanced upon a boutique and entered inside it. She bought a few pieces of band aid and a pair of beaded flip flops. She decided to buy one because she realized that she could no longer stand the excruciating pain caused by her shoes.

When she got back to the reception, one of the bridesmaids grabbed her arm and said, “The bride’s going to toss the bouquet, hurry!”

Leni got the bouquet but handed it to the girl beside her because she doesn’t want to draw attention. On the other hand, Aldo got the garter. Once again, Leni got bored.

Afterwards, the couple’s favorite songs like “Buttercup” were played. The couple started to dance and invited others to join them. This time, Leni amused herself by trying the different deserts on the buffet table.

A few minutes later, Aldo approached her.

“Hindi kita nakilala ah. Bagay sa’yo yang suot mo. Where’s your glasses?”

“Nagpa-pahinga muna sa cabinet ko. Nakaka-panibago ba ang hitsura ko ngayon?”

“Oo, ngayon lang kasi kita nakita ulit ng naka ganyan.Yung huli, nung debut ni Agatha. Teka, kanina ka pa ata kumakain jan ah. Baka naman ma-impacho ka na.”

“Hindi naman sigiuro. Tsaka, sa mga ganitong pagka-kataon, pagkain lang ang nagpapa-saya sa akin. Medyo naiinip na kasi ako dito eh.”

“Ganun ba? Tara, sayaw na lang tayo para matunaw yang mga kinain mo.”

“Gusto ko sana, kaso lang…..”

“Kaso lang ano?”

“Naka tsinelas lang ako.Bumili ako kanina kasi ang sakit na nung sandals ko. Pero, ‘match’ naman sa suot ko eh. Tignan mo.”

“ Ok lang yan, wala naman makaka-pansin.”

When they walked towards the dance floor, the dj began to play Moonstar88’s version of “Panalangin” which was Leni’s current favorite.

“Aldo, hindi yata bagay sa akin yung kanta. Dun na lang sa girlfriend mo. Nasaan pala siya?”

“Umuwi na mag-isa. Nagpumilit magpa-hatid sa akin, tinawagan bigla ng boss niya. Pasensya ka na sa kanya kanina ha.”

“Wala yun. Naintindihan ko naman eh.”

He took her hand and they danced. At this moment, she wished that Red would take Aldo’s place.

Leni is currently wearing the charm bracelet that Red once gave her. As they were dancing, the bracelet fell on the floor.

When the song ended, Leni thanked Aldo and went back to her seat. She opened her phone and saw 1 missed call from Adam. Before she decided to call him back, Leni approached Louie first.

“Hey Leni, thank you for coming. Na-una na yata si Tita.”

“I know, she left earlier because she has to do something else daw.”

“I almost didn’t recognize you because you don’t have braces and eyeglasses anymore. Wag ka nang mag-salamin ah. By the way, galit ka pa ba sa akin?”

“Hindi na. Bakit naman?”

“I’ve been cruel to you when we were young. I’m afraid na baka gantihan mo ako sa kasal ko. Baka nilagyan mo ng granada o lason yung cake namin.”

“Sus, hindi ko yun gagawin noh. I know that you were such an obnoxious brat before,pero wala na yun sa akin.

”Thanks again. By the way, how are you going to get home?”

“I’ll take a jeep or a taxi. Malapit lang naman eh.”

“Hay naku Leni, it’s not safe to travel alone. Gabi na.”

“Ako pa, eh Manila girl ako. Besides, siga ako sa daan unlike Ate Agatha.”

“Ikumpara ba ang sarili sa patay?Teka, ihahanap kita ng kasama pauwi. Ako pa masisi ni Tita Juana pag may nangyari sa iyo.”

“Thanks Louie…Congratulations.”

Chapter Five: Part One

After eating dinner, Leni's aunt tolde her about Louie's upcoming wedding.

"Louie came earlier and gave me the invitation and he also wants you to come. I'm going to buy you a dress, so you have something to wear for the wedding. "
"Tita, you don't have to. I think, I brought something that would be appropriate for the occasion."
"Ok, let me see it."

Leni got her turquoise dress from her closet and showed it to her aunt.
"Where did you get this? Maganda."
"I bought this from Ate Agatha's favorite boutique, but my friends chose this dress for me.The last that I wore this was during our graduation. Magaling po sila pumili."
"You could wear this for the wedding, Leni."
"Thanks Tita. Grabe, I can't imagine that Louie would get married. He was an obnoxious brat before. Naalala ko po tuloy na lagi nila akong ini-inis ni Teta."
"Leni,they've matured already. Kalimutan mo na yung mga ginawa nila sa'yo."
"Opo Tita,naalala ko lang po bigla pero, wala na naman sa akin yun eh."
---

Louie's wedding finally arrived and everyone was getting ready for the event.

For some reasons, Leni didn't feel like going because she's anticipating the newest soap opera. She went to the living room and opened the television as her aunt caught her.
"Leni, we have to leave in an hour and you're not yet dressed. Is there a problem?"
"It's just that I don't feel like going. Most of the people there were Ate Agatha's friends. For sure, I'll get out of place."
"You'll be missing a lot, especially the food. Sige, ikaw din.Baka magsisi ka na hindi ka pumunta."
When she heard the word 'food', Leni's face beamed with excitement and went back to her room.
Once again, she removed her eyeglasses and put back her contact lens, wore her turquoise dress and slipped her stilletos on.

---
The bride and grooms family and friends were there. Teta, and the rest of Agatha's friends were seated accross Leni. She waived at them as they smiled back.

"Teta, who's that?"
"Leni, Agatha's cousin. Yung laging sinama niya sa tambayan natin noon."
"Wow, the little girl has grown up. In fairness, gumanda siya since the last time I saw her. Halos hindi ko na siya makilala."

Thirty minutes had passed and the ceremony haven't began because the bride got stuck in the traffic. People were staring at their watches as the groom was fidgeting and wiping his face. Aldo, his best man patted him at his back and said,
"Pare, dadating din yun, relax ka lang."
One kid yelled, "Hindi na tuloy ang kasal! Mag-swimming na tayo!"
The mother grabbed the child and slapped him.
At this moment, Leni got thirsty and went to a nearby sari-sari store and bought a bottle of water. When she got inside the church, the bride was walking down the aisle.

The choir sang Ariel Rivera's "Minsan lang kitang iibigin" as the bride marched forward. Everyone seemed to get carried away. Leni can't help but get teary eyed because she realized that Agatha could have been married if that accident didn't happen. When she looked at groom, she hid herself with a fan and chuckled.
Her aunt caught her and said
"Hija, why are you laughing?"
"Louie is just so funny. He looked like a 'boyoyong' clown crying. Hindi po kasi bagay eh."
"Don't make fun of him, Leni. Umayos ka.Kapag may ginawa kang kapilyahan ngayon, kukurutin kita."
"Tita, don't worry. I'm going to behave, I won't do anything stupid. I promise."

To be continued.....

* Picture from Kuya Gilbz and Ate Rochelle's wedding (December 15, 2007).

Chapter Four: Part Three

When she got home, Leni thought about what Aldo told her. It really made sense because she finally realized that Adam and Faith were right when they told her that she was not herself when she was with Red. She can display her wacky side around the people in her class and her friends from the theater group. But, when she was with Red and his teammates, she wears another mask by pretending to be “sosyal”. She has to do this, in order to get accepted by them because they were the kind of people who go for the obvious. She was liked by both parties, but it didn’t last for long. When he dumped Leni, his teammates and their ‘girlfriends’ began to ignore her. Cocoy, one of Red’s buddies labeled her as a ‘has been’. He bullied Leni most of the time. On the contrary, her classmates and closest friends were there for her.
There was one time when Leni got picked by Cocoy. It happened during final exams, Leni, Ode, and Faith were reviewing inside La Prinsesa when Cocoy and two of his friends approached them.
“How’s the ‘has-been’ after the break-up?” Cocoy said as he put his arm on her shoulder.
Annoyed with the guy’s gesture, Leni removed his arms and said, “We’re not close. So, I’m not obliged to answer your question.” She tried to ignore him by scribbling notes.
“Aba, ang taray mo ah. Parang ang ganda mo. Pasalamat ka at naging kayo ni Red. Do you want to know the truth? The reason why he asked you out when you were in second year was because I told him na pag-tripan ka niya. I can’t understand why the he took you seriously. But, it was good that he dumped you. Ang corny mo kasi eh. O ano, pahiya ka?”
“So, you’re saying that I’m a stupid bet?”
“You got it.”
“Eto pa ang hindi mo nalalaman, ung ex mo pinagpalit ka sa team captain ng cheering squad kasi hindi na niya kaya sakyan yung mga trip mo sa Teatro. Ang laki nga ng sakripisyo niya nung naging kayo. Mabuti na lang at nakinig siya sa payo ko. Ang hirap naman sa tulad ni Red na magka-girlfriend ng gumamagaya ng boses ni Kiko Matsing at avid fan ni Billy Crawford.”
Leni got lost for words because she really wanted to cry.
“Cocoy, get a life. Mag-aral ka na lang.”
He was about to leave when Faith and Ode defended her.
“Ano ba ang ginawa ni Leni? Nanahimik lang kami dito.”
“Wala, trip ko lang siya asarin yung mga trying hard na katulad niya. Another thing Leni, you never fitted in the group.Wag mo nang ipilit yung sarili mo.”
“Oh my God Cocoy, I can’t believe na pumapatol ka pala sa babae. Para kang bata.Grow up! Ang laki mong bulas, pero ang utak mo, pang five years old.”
“Pag-pasensyahan nyo na wala kasing pumapansin dyan eh. Palibhasa, kamukha ni Yoda, yung sa Star Wars”
Then, Ode finally took the chance to speak.
“Guys, this conversation won’t get us anywhere. Let’s go.” She said as the three of them stood up.


After hearing these words, Cocoy got humiliated. “Pare, sapul ka dun ah. May hawig ka nga kay Yoda.” His friends said.

“Bye Yoda!” The three of them said in unison as they left the café.
After walking a few steps, Faith and Ode noticed that Leni was bothered.
Faith patted her back and said, “Leni, just ignore everything that he said. He doesn’t have the right to label you as a ‘has-been’.”
“Faith is right. He’s not worth your time. Cocoy is a loser, not you. I heard from someone that he won’t be able to graduate this year because of his back subjects. He’s just being defensive. Don’t go down on his level.”
“Thanks, gusto ko lang na matahimik ang buhay ko.”
“Leni, why don’t you take a vacation outside Manila after our graduation? This school year has been stressful for us, we need to re-charge ourselves.”
“Pwede rin, iisipin ko pa kung saan.”

Chapter Four: Part Two

When she arrived at the cemetery, she got the clay-made cupcake inside her bag. Then, she placed a small candle on the top of it.

“Happy Birthday, Ate Agatha.Here's a cupcake for you.This is your favorite,remember. Sorry, I didn’t know how to make a real one.” She paused for a while, when her phone rang.

“Hi Leni, kumusta ka na?” Red asked her

“I’m good. Why did you call?” She said anxiously.

“I wanted to talk to you. When I went to your house a few weeks ago, your brother told me that you went to the province. Kailan ka ba babalik?”

“Hindi ko pa alam. Baka matagalan pa ako dito. Wait, if this is about the bag, I’m sorry.”

“No, I should be the one to apologize. I know that you just did it because you’re angry at me. Sana hindi mo na lang siya dinamay. Ako na lang sana ang binuhusan mo ng coke. Bakit hindi mo na lang ako kausapin nung time na yun.”

“Red, you have to know that I find it hard to talk to you after we broke up. Stop telling me what to do because I’m not your girlfriend anymore. By the way, this is not the right time to talk about it. I’m in the cemetery. I’m spending some time with Ate Agatha.”

“I’m really sorry. I hope that we could talk when you get back here. Alam ko na may mga bagay tayo na dapat pa rin natin pag-usapan.”

She put her cell phone inside her bag and sat on the grass. Leni really wanted to talk to him but she’s not ready to do so, because the more she hears his voice, the more she recalls the moment that he dumped her.

A few minutes later, Aldo came with a bouquet of flowers.

“Ate Agatha, I’m really sorry for all I’ve done. I really wish that I could turn back time.”

“Don’t worry, she already forgave you Leni. You don’t have to feel guilty anymore.Tapos na yun.” Aldo said as he patted her at the back.

“Ay, nandiyan ka pala…You miss her, don’t you?” Leni asked

“Yes. Even if I had a girlfriend already, naaalala ko pa rin ang pinsan mo” Aldo said as he looked away.

’“I know, hindi talaga siya basta-basta makakalimutan. Matagal kasi ang pinag-samahan niyo eh. You grew up together kasi. Minsan, naisip ko na sana, ganyan kami ng ex ko. By the way, what’s the name of your girlfriend?”

“Her name is Carol, she lives in Manila. I’m going to bring her to Louie’s wedding. Ipapakilala ko siya sa’yo”

“How long have you been dating?”

“Three years….Leni, I’ll be going to Manila next week. May aasikasuhin lang ako. Mong is the one who’ll select the casts. Kayo muna ang bahala dun sa play. Pagbalik ko, kasama ko na si Carol.”

“By the way, did you attend my cousin’s wake? Hindi ko kasi matandaan kung nakita kita .”

“Yes, I was there. Binati nga kita, hindi mo lang ako pinansin.”

Leni nodded and said. “Really? Shucks, I never realized how snobbish I was. Pasensya na.”

“Leni, I have another favor to ask you. Could you visit Lolo Celso while I’m in Manila?”

“Sure, yun lang pala. Aldo, I have to go. Nood muna ako ng mga DVD sa bahay.”

After walking a few steps away, Leni imitated Kiko Matsing’s voice saying, “Paalam,hanggang sa muli.”

Aldo laughed, “Leni, nakaka-ganyan ka ba sa boyfriend mo o sa ibang tao?

“Actually, sa boyfriend ko, hindi.Bakit mo naman natanong?”

“ Nakaka-wala kasi ng poise,ang panget.”

“Sorry po ‘Manong Aldo’. Hindi kasi ako Dalagang Pilipina katulad ng pinsan ko. Inaaliw lang kita, ang drama mo kasi eh…O sige na, mauna na ako, usap muna kayo ni Ate Agatha.”

“Ok, Ingat ka na lang.”

Chapter Four: Part One

One Saturday afternoon, she planned to go to visit Agatha at the cemetery. Before she left, she asked her aunt asked her to bring freshly-baked empanadas to Aldo’s grandfather. After getting the brown bag, she also brought the script with her. The moment she reached his house, memories flashed back when her cousin used to bring her there. Aldo’s house used to be their barkada’s hang-out since they were kids. Whenever Leni felt out of place, she would roam around the garden and play with the butterflies. They became her imaginary friends.

The garden was still there, nothing has been changed.

She walked closely and she saw two butterflies chasing each other, until the other one eluded. Then, she pictured her life with what she saw earlier. Leni remembered the people who were once with her: Her father, who left them when she was seven. He promised that he would come back after two months but he didn’t. Nanay, her grandmother who took care of them. She died a year before Leni graduated from college. Red, her first boyfriend, dumped her on her birthday. They all left her with different reasons. Then, she realized that she should put back the broken pieces again. “There’s no other way but to move forward.” She told herself.

Leni knocked at the door and Aldo opened it. “Tuloy ka” He said.

“Tita Juana asked me to give these to your grandfather. By the way, I also brought the script with me. I shortened it already.” She said as she handed the brown bag and folder to him.

“Mukhang masarap ah. Sa bagay, magaling talagang mag-luto si Tita.”

“Aldo,sino ba yung dumating?” A voice from the room upstairs said.

“Si Lolo Celso yun, di na pala siya nakaka-tayo.” Then, the two went inside the room.

“Kumusta na po kayo?”

“Eto, medyo mahina na.Ano nga pala ulit pangalan mo hija?”

“Leni po, pinsan po ako ni Agatha. Di niyo na po siguro naaalala pero lagi po niya ako kasama dito noon.”

“Ay oo, naalala ko na. Ikaw yung palaging mag-isang naka-upo sa labas. Ang laki mo na ah. Nag-aaral ka pa ba?”

“Hindi po, kakatapos ko lang po ng college.”

“Mabuti naman kung ganun. Teka, hindi ka ba muna kakain ng merienda?”

“Hindi na po siguro, dadalawin ko pa po si Ate Agatha. Birthday po kasi niya ngayon.”

“Punta ka palagi dito ha. Kwentuhan tayo.”

“O sige po.Babalik na lang po ako sa ibang araw.”

After that conversation with the old man, Aldo accompanied her outside

“Aldo, ang galing naman ng lolo mo. Naalala pa niya ako.”

“Siyempre naman, palagi ka noon nandito eh. Actually, nung hindi ka na pumupunta, palagi ka niya hinahanap. Natutuwa kasi siya sa’yo.”

“May natutuwa pa pala sa akin nung bata ako. Akala ko, kay Ate Agatha lang. I don’t think that I enjoyed my childhood. Wala kasi akong kaibigan nung bata ako. Loner ako nun. Tapos, saling-kit pa ako sa inyo. Sa totoo lang, nung college lang ako nagkaroon ng mga totoong kaibigan. Teka, ang drama ko na. Anyway, if there’s anything that you want to change in the script, just let me know.”

“Sure, I will. Leni, naalala ko yun. Kami yung mga teenager nung panahon na yun, tapos ikaw yung bata kaya hindi ka maka-sabay sa amin. Pero, hindi ibig-sabihin nun na ayaw namin sa’yo. Ma-iba pala tayo, saan na nga pala ang punta mo ngayon?”

“I’m going to visit Ate Agatha and offer a mass for her.”

“You don’t have to, I saw your aunt earlier this morning. She told me that she already offered a mass for her. Bakit hindi ka kasama kanina?”

“Late kasi ako nagising. Napuyat ako kagabi, kausap ko yung friend ko sa cell phone.”

“Baka naman boyfriend mo? Lagi ka kasi may kausap sa phone”

“Uy, Hindi ah. We broke up, remember? He doesn’t have a reason to call me. Anyway, that was my best friend Adam. Lagi ko lang sila kinukulit. Ngayon lang kasi kami nagka-hiwalay. Noon, araw –araw ko sila kasama. Hindi pa kasi ako sanay na wala sila sa tabi ko. O paano, alis na ako.”

“Ah ok, baka pumunta ako doon mamamaya.”

As stepped outside, Leni recalled another memory from that house.

One of Agatha’s friends gave each one of them a triangle made out of art neon green and pink cartolina which they called as the “ticket to heaven”.

Leni was expecting to get one, but she wasn’t.

“Makulit ka kasi, kaya ka walang ticket sa heaven.” She told her.

To her disappointment, she went to the garden when Aldo’s grandfather approached her.

“Hija, what’s wrong?”

Lenis shook her head and said.

“They didn’t give me a ticket to heaven. Hindi na daw po ako pwede doon.”

“Don’t believe them. You don’t need a ticket to get there. Ang importante, mabuti kang tao. Halika, para hindi ka mainip, tuturuan kitang gumawa ng elesi. Pabayaan mo sila doon.”

“Yehey!” Leni said with excitement.

After she remembered that moment with Lolo Celso, she realized that she needs to spend time with him while she’s staying there. She considered him as the grandfather that she never had. Leni never got the chance to know her grandfather, because he died a month after she was born.